My situation I feel is a tad more delicate. This keeps you from seeing content they share. Then I sent another message a few hours later, admitting that I knew I had bombarded him with too many messages and mixed messages and that I knew I was all over the place, and how I wished we could have met after I was independent and after he had dated and they everything would have been magical. And hes regretting dumping you. Hes holding all the cards right now and I hate it! He Has to Lose You to Realize Your Worth - Magnet of Success Did i lost her forever?. I was not trying to do anything wrong or cause any upset I was just having fun is all, it was just a goofy picture that has an inside story of how Im ditzy. Learn the signs you're dating a narcissist and how to get out. Anyway, he walked out of his shift that night. He said I was his weakness, as he is mine, and for 7 years, we could not cut contact, at some point we came back to chat or to Skype, even thoug we were in other relationships already. 4 days ago I spoke with him and told him that I love him a lot and want to be with and through this hard times and wish there was a way to help him , and that I understand that he need time alone to think about everything , and that it doesnt mean I give up on him . He was amazing though. My ex went through depression for 10 years because his ex left him. This is where he generally goes through the five stages above. he tells our friends how much he misses me and wants to see me..im just not sure im ready yet..but maybe i should really try so i can be sure of my feelings, i didnt want to look pathetic and so i just worked on moving on right after the sad breakup..now i feel like i wanna do all these and i hope its not too late. This past weekend, I was at his sons birthday party, and things seemed to be like they used to be (another tidbit of information he is much older than me, and our relationship has been kept private from everybody except our closest friends) so everyone at the birthday party (his mother knows so everyone besides her) does not know about us. If you do see your ex out in public, keep your eyes open: Guys are usually good at repressing their feelings and putting on a show of being normal in public. He has a 13 yr old son with someone else and today he said she visited him at his place of employment. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I am not going to lie to you because I want you to truly know whats going on (rather than give you false hope). Since, I have not contacted him nor has he reached out to me its almost going to be 10 months. We are both pretty alike. We had a really good conversation. I dont think someone can move on so quickly unless they really dont like you. During this whole bad period I had intended to attempt to talk and possibly reconcile with him, but never got a chance while defending my integrity. In fact, this is the exact process that has been responsible for almost all of my success stories. He told me it was 4 weeks he had been unhappy for not 8 as initially said. Chasing, doing a big song and dance and sharing old memories will only give off a desperate vibe, and we all run away from that whether weve just broken up or were being approached for the first time. Without this phase, nothing will work. He said doesnt want the relationship anymore and we can just be friends. If you and your ex want to maintain a friendship, you have to act like friends. I dont know what to do. He tells me hell always love me, but hes living his life with no expectations and he thinks its best for us to both move on. Personally, I can see why the no contact rule would work. girlshealth.gov/relationships/dating/breaking_up.html, plannedparenthood.org/learn/sex-and-relationships/relationships/how-should-i-end-relationship, loveisrespect.org/dating-basics/should-we-break-up, Breaking Up Is Hard to Do: These 9 Tips Can Help, The Practical Guide to Healing a Broken Heart, 9 Signs Youre Dating a Narcissist and How to Get Out, How to Stop Loving Someone and Start Moving On, Debra Rose Wilson, Ph.D., MSN, R.N., IBCLC, AHN-BC, CHT, How to Recognize and Get Over Commitment Issues, spending the night together in the same bed, providing consistent emotional or financial support, brings you joy (see friends, have a new experience, spend time on your favorite hobby), helps you process your feelings (make art or music, journal, talk to a therapist or other support person). WebHow To Get Your Ex Back After Breaking Up (Without Looking Desperate) 1. Instigate jealousy or envy by opening yourself up to the possibility of other men. He and I use an app called kakaotalk; which is korean version of WhatApp/Viber. Then it got worse when he completely stopped being sexual active. We didnt agree on anything so the realitionship status is still there and i dont know how talk to him. How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Realize He Needs You / How To WebOne: You probably don't want to pay a visit to that person post-breakup. We were together for 10 months we have 9 month old twins together and we would fuss, fight, argue, stop speaking to each other within the relationship I love him with my whole heart. We just clicked. Im going to try this process and see if he decides to commit I just hope I did the right thing leaving him because we never had one any issues. I really want him back because I love him so much and u cant get over the fact that we were so happy initially and just 10 days before the brk up was my bday when he was the one to talk about our future and make me feel loved. How To Handle Differing Values With An Ex Boyfriend There were no arguments, we seemed to be a perfect match, liked doing the same things and happy together. While its good that youre feeling better and in a better headspace, in the end it will be much more powerful if you let him reach out to you first. We both should of have talked about what was going to happen with us, but we never got around to that. I dont think I can be just friends because I still have feelings for him. when I should tell him that I wanna be with him again, as he still says he loves me I deleted his Facebook, whats up stuffs to stop myself contacting him.. Ex texted me to say merry Christmas Day before Christmas and I ignored. We were friends before dating and he is my best friend. Narcissist take a little longer to come around as hes still got his mind made up that YOU are going to call him. Is there any way that we can get back together. I ended up blocking him on everything, something I wished I didnt do because now I want to talk to him, but cant because my pride wont allow me to unblock him. You will have just formed a new habit of not initiating contact with him first. This gives you time to focus on yourself, she says. So I have totally backed away and I dont initiate the texting I let him and he continues to text me, starting with good morning, and a random hey. If you want more details on how to carry out the no contact period, check out an article I wrote on this exact topic called, What is the 30 Day No Contact Rule.. I used to use this formula all the time with my ex but he was a narccisist and used devalue discard almost monthly for 18 years to keep me in love with him. It could be said that there are requirements when applying for a relationship and one of the requirements is that you must be a challenge. Well, its simple: with these four phases. Suggest options to help us. I came home one day and he asked if I ever questioned our relationship. This time however, we argued again and I tried to resolve the issue however, I think he had reached his limit with me. Continue to enjoy and pursue the simple things in life that make you happy. Parker recommends creating a daily self-care routine. You can use this silent stalking as an excellent way to make him yearn for you. To be high value, a woman has to be the one who never chases anyone. It means hes hurting and wants to see what you are doing. My boyfriend of a year and I has gotten into the second fight of our relationship. My ex wanted to reach out to me all the time during No Contact. So it was never an official relationship. Im not texting you because you msde it clesr you dont want this relationship wait for his response. But we havnt spoke since the break up. I know we can work on things but I dont know How to get him to understand. My question is what should I do ? I was so heart broken I sat on his lap crying telling him how much I care about him and telling him I dont want you to do this and he said he didnt want to do this but he had to. The relationship was pretty turbulent but our feelings were passionate and intense. When I dropped him off he asked for a hug. as some people will break up out of anger. I even plan on giving him something for his birthday next month. It been more than.four weeks i had used the ni contact rule with my ex.Last week he keep looking up on my status..but there is no any interaction between us. Is he testing me? We had plans of getting married and building a life together. But giving him space and letting him get in touch withyouis one of the best things you can do because: Now, all of this is going to be hard! And 1 month 1/2 since we last spoke. If I was you I wouldnt even stress about it, hi my ex calls me every times she is drunk can i get her back and many times she comment through facebook that she loves me but when i ask her she told me the same thing but she doesnt want to come back to me i remember two days ago we meet in club then i receive a call from my friend i went out to receive that call i didnt know she was behind my back we talk we laght but when am throung she became jelours and even slap me i dont why she slap me and we were not together please i need your help on this. Just set the box aside where you wont see it all the time. But I do feel like this isnt over in some way. Now, you might meet other men and realize you only want your ex back but you also might meet other men and realize there is a whole world out there full of new people to meet. Our text messages were at first him telling me that he would never see or talk to me again. You bet. please advise. Does he seem to show up at places you are at? There was no signs showing a breakup since we never really had problems. So we talked about our realitionship and how i feel about him not calling me or texting me enough, compared to what i do to him. If youre truly invested in this relationship and it has any chance in hell at being reconciled, you must consider whats best for the longevity of the relationship. He texts me every so often, maybe with a picture of a car he thinks we both like, and used to ask me about my class. Things just kept spiraling. This is what is going to put you in the position of power when it comes to making your ex miss you. The 30-day No Contact Rule is a time when you give your heart a break from the pain of a breakup by cutting off communication with your EX. So I need to know what to do in this specific situation. Why would he care if I still use the app if he is the one who ended the relationship. And, Ill be honest with you, I am guilty of all of the above. M missing him alot! lol. He does not want me back. I am going on another trip in a week to just get out of here and not let sadness come to my life.